Sending your child off to college feels a lot like dropping them off at kindergarten for the first time. You may want to hold their hand, comfort them, or even help with their assignments until they settle in. These protective instincts could become even stronger as they head off to college.
You might feel the urge to unpack their dorm, meet their resident advisor, or email their professors to ensure fair treatment. If this sounds like you, it might be time to start letting go. While transitioning to college is a big step, it’s crucial to teach your child independence to help them adjust successfully.
Letting go can be daunting, but it’s essential for your child to become a self-reliant adult. If you’re unsure where to start, here are five tips to help your child gain independence before college:
First, teach your child about budgeting and managing a bank account. Many college freshmen won’t have a job in their first semester and will need to rely on savings or student loans. Without money management skills, those funds could quickly disappear on takeout and trips.
Help your child create a balanced budget, cut expenses, and review finances regularly. It’s also helpful to explain federal and private student loans and their interest rates. Remind them to avoid credit card offers in their first year. A solid financial plan will allow them to focus on what’s important—their studies.
College students often turn to pizza, ramen, and beer, so emphasize a healthy lifestyle. Encourage a regular routine for eating and cleaning. Plan family workouts to introduce fitness into their life, and maybe teach them to cook as a fun bonding activity.
Discuss responsible drinking with your child, as they’ll likely experiment with alcohol. It’s crucial to give them the tools to drink responsibly, and if needed, explore recovery options. Sometimes, letting them handle challenges teaches valuable problem-solving skills for adult life. Always rescuing them can lead to entitlement and excuses, which won’t benefit their future success.
Although you may want to call, text, or email constantly, this can feel overwhelming. Work on developing an adult relationship with your child. Decide whether communication should be scheduled or more spontaneous and let them decide how to handle care packages or messages from home, giving them a sense of freedom.
Recognize that you can’t always save the day. Letting them make mistakes and learn from them is vital for growth. While we naturally try to protect our children from failure, stumbling is part of learning, helping them make better decisions in the future.
College is a big change, but by preparing your child to lead a healthier lifestyle and manage money wisely, you can set them on the right path. They won’t be perfect, and they need to learn—that’s what growing up is all about!
